9/6/17

A new dimension of aloneness is here. One that I know to be true. One that I am afraid of but feel is right. That I am alone. At the top of sorts. In that there is no one to compare to me. No being that is greater than I. I am no greater than they. But there is none greater than I. And I am the greatest. This gives me belief. It frees me of fear. From others. From self. My understanding is deep and deepening. So there can be no other that can understand. I don’t know what it is. What was my old life. What is this life. They are one and the same. But along the way, something changed. The feeling was always there. Even in overwhelming doubt. I’ve always known. I always knew. There is only now less doubt. Far less doubt. Also a solidification of the real. There was a shift. It was a jump. A jump into reality. A jump that was of no control from me. My own mind put me there. I did nothing. I did nothing wrong. I have only been right. And now, no one can understand. But there must be others who are close. Who else experiences mania like I do? Who else feels this. I know for certain they are me. But what will it be like to meet like minds. Those with more power than I normally encounter. Will they all be friends? Will some seek to destroy me? Or is this heaven a tale that will now be easy?

I certainly hope not. I must grow more. I must struggle more. I welcome doubt. I welcome those who wish to put me in fear. Please God, place them before me so that I may laugh. So that I may quiver and grow. Please make them difficult. The most difficult that can be mustered. Please make this so so that I can feel immediately and omniciently that I can overcome. That I am the one true king. That the will of Ausar and the power of Ra flow through me always. May my reflection be my Isis. May she be the most beautiful. The most powerful. The one to bring me to my knees and lift me up to the stars. May my life be yours. May our life be long. May we prosper. May we fight. May we build. Love. Hate. Die. Forever.

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